Visiting Cemeteries: Why it’s Important

Recently, my brother and I went to Austin. It was the first time either of us had been to the city. What’s more, it had been at least two years since we had seen each other. On this trip, we decided to visit all of the museums and all of the parks we could find in addition to the usual sights and sounds of one of the most diverse cities in Texas.

In our exuberant crisscrossing of the city, we ran across a cemetery.

“Oh! Let’s stop here and check it out!” I said.

Used to my eccentricities, my brother shrugged and pulled over. We went to inspect what sort of final resting place Austin had to offer.

The sign at the entrance of the cemetery explained that this parcel of land had once been a privately owned cemetery until the 1920’s when the state bought it and turned it into a public cemetery. While there were a couple of graves that had not been moved, most of the current inhabitants began trickling in after the purchase had taken place.

Still, it was a beautiful place. The tombstones were ornately carved and decorated, shaded by large oak trees sporting oversized wind chimes. Several benches dotted the area as did vibrantly colored floral and knick knack offerings to the deceased.

“Why are there so many benches?” My brother asked. He’s been humoring me as I have been wandering around the tombstones, speaking names out loud and occasionally taking pictures of the more interesting ones.

“It’s so that people can come and visit their loved ones,” I explained. “There was a time when people would come and have big family picnics in graveyards. It was a way for people to remember their ancestors and to connect with their family roots.”

“People don’t do that anymore,” he observed. “Graveyards are creepy.”

It’s a common thing I hear and I really don’t believe it. My friends and I visit graveyards regularly. Sometimes to pay homage to one of our deceased family members, sometimes to find historical people’s final resting places, and sometimes, just to commune with the idea and concept that is death. We, as a society, have become so much more removed from the reality of death. Not many of us have ever been in the presence of one who has recently deceased. Few of us have had to kill to survive. Visiting graveyards is how we can maintain that connection, that respect with death. It is a way for us to keep the perspective that we can’t live forever, so it’s important to live today.

And it’s to respect and keep alive the memory of those buried. Ancient Egyptians believed that every time a deceased person’s name was read or spoken, it gives more energy to that person. It keeps them connected to the earthly realm and, therefore, never really gone.

I don’t know if that is true, but I would like to think that when I am dead that someone would walk past my grave and whisper my name, recognizing that I had once walked the earth. That I was real and had once lived.

 

Happy Halloween!

Kira

Godparents: Deciding to Whom You Should Bequeath Your Offspring

Humans tend to die. It’s one of the more unfortunate side effects of life. However, if both you and your co-parental figure manage to bite the big one before your spawn are considered fully grown by local law, then there’s the thorny issue of who will be responsible for them.

Most parents have their backups picked before their little monster even comes into the world, but for those of us who aren’t so pessimistic about our ability to survive parenthood, here are some points to consider when choosing the godparents of your mini terrors.

1.       Are the beings you chose to care for your animated DNA strands actually deities? I mean, god parents really should live up to the title, right? If you can’t have actual deities take care of your kids, then you’ll just have to settle for those of your own ilk.

2.       Do your little snot monsters know the candidates you are considering? Do they like them? Do the potential parental replacements get along with your kids? If so, cross them off the list. The best thing for your kids is to be uncomfortable with wherever they end up. Putting them in a strange place with strange people will motivate them to better themselves.  Plus, if they wind up with someone terrible, it will forever enshrine your memory. The only thing you have to do is make sure the adult knows what they are getting into.

3.       Make sure the replacement parents and/or family lives far away from where you and yours lived. Again, you want to go for the most change possible for after you pass. It will be for the best that I promise you.

Now, if you can’t find anyone that would be willing to take on your spawn, more or less sight unseen, there is one more option. You can leave your offspring to your local government. From there, they will be put into what they call a system where they will be shipped around to different strangers or even group homes until they come of age. As far as change, that would be the best option.

In the end, just do what’s right for you and your family. Give lots of thought to what would happen should you end up six feet under.

Plan Ahead,

Azra

***Disclaimer***Azra has been around children for centuries. While not having any of his own, part of being an exiled angel means blending in on earth. As he traveled the earth, he picked up on a lot of parenting practices across the globe. This blog is meant to share his parenting wisdom with a new generation. And to win a bet.

*Note: any advice given is meant to be satirical and not to be taken literally. Please do not exercise it upon any living being, child or otherwise.*

Halloween Musings of a Word Slinger

The summer heat is finally dying. There’s a crispness to the air that signals the changing of the seasons, the coming of the darkness after what seems like an eternity of brightness. In the distant evening I can hear the werewolves howl as they circle their prey.

To most, this time of year is about death, endings, and fear. It’s about costumes and candy and being scared.

For me, it’s the time of the year when I come alive. When I get energized. When I get myself organized and ready for the coming year. When life makes so much more sense. This time of year is renewal, and hope. This is my new year.

Happy Halloween, my friends. May the treats be plenty and the tricks always teach you something.

Trick or Treat

Kira