Only Lovers Left Alive: Movies about Writing

This will be short as there’s only one part of this movie that’s about writing is John Hurt’s character. I miss John Hurt.

But first, I must express my love for this quirky, dark, Jim Jarmusch love story. Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston play Eve and Adam, respectfully. This intellectual and artistic vampire couple have been married for centuries, attempting to survive as human blood becomes more and more tainted by chemicals and pollutants. Adam obtains blood by bribing a blood bank phlebotomist played by Jeffrey Wright. Complications come in the form of Eve’s reckless sister, Ava (Mia Wasikowska) and her “interest” in a young man who helps Adam when he needs things named Ian (Anton Yelchin). The movie is more about depression and facing the idea of death from a vampirism point of view.

The part I want to talk about is John Hurt as Christopher Marlowe. The elderly Hurt plays Marlowe as a version of the playwright who faked his own death and became a vampire later in life. He’s poetic and speaks

House (1985): Movies about Writing

Oh, the 80s. You never disappoint when it comes to terrible, yet oh-so-entertaining movies. Although, this was partially written by Fred Dekker, who wrote Monster Squad, so I assume parts of this were meant to be funny.

Bestselling author Roger Cobb (William Katt, the Great American Hero and poor Tommy who took Carrie to the prom) inherits his aunt’s house after she’s found hanging from her bedroom. By the way, she was found by a kid delivery groceries who called himself “grocery boy”. Cobb’s been having issues ever since his son, Jimmy, practically vanished right in front of him. His actress wife, Sandy (Kay Lenz) has separated from him and his fans are disappointed that he’s taking a break from fiction in order to write a Vietnam memoir. I pointed at the screen and yelled in a German accent when i saw that one of the fans was Austin Powers actress Mindy Sterling.

This sweater terrifies me.

Cobb stays in the house in order to work, but also because of a hilarious . . . I mean, devastating conversation he remembers where his aunt claims that the house took his son. The aunt shows up once more to warn him that the house is out to get him, but not about the super deep V sweater he swears. Cobb meets his new neighbor, Harold played by Norm! George Wendt’s character turns out to be a fan of Cobb’s books so he gives out some awkward stalker vibes. I think he’s there for comic relief, but it’s difficult to tell what is comedic on purpose.

As the house starts to attack using monsters, Billy Bass the dancing fish, a hag version of Sandy, ghosts, goblins, and Vietnam flashbacks, Cobb gets very little writing done. Instead, he tries to save his son from a hell dimension where he’s being held by the ghost of his angry Nam platoon-mate played by Richard Moll. It’s always the way. You set aside time to write and instead you have to rescue your child from a decomposing corpse.

You should check out this and then watch House II: The Second Story. No, really. That’s the title.

I Am Frankelda: Movies about Writing

You want to see something pretty? You want to see something creepy? You want to see something pretty creepy? Watch I am Frankelda.

This is a prequel to the television series from a couple of years ago that was on HBO in the states. The two main characters are Frankelda/Francisca (voiced by Mireya Mendoza) and Herneval (voiced by Claudis Bridgforth). They grow up separately, their lives crossing here and there. Francisca is an orphan whose grandmother emotionally abuses her and knocks down her dream to to be a writer of scary stories. Herneval is the prince in a land of nightmares where the citizens, called Terrors, are fading away. It’s the job of the head nightmare writer, Procustes (voiced by Luis Leonardo Suarez) to keep people in Frankelda’s world interested their stories so they are saved from oblivion. However, Procutes has writer’s block. Instead of taking responsibility, he blames humans for not liking his stories. Even monsters can’t handle criticism.

Despite her grandmother constantly trouncing on her dreams and telling her that no one will buy horror stories written by a girl, Francisca still believes she can succeed as her mother has always encouraged her before dying of tuberculous (did I mention that this takes place in the 1800s?). Her town is home to an editor who is also the father of a boy she grew up with. The editor cruelly rejects her stories without reading them and Francisca runs to her grandmother’s grave for a good cry. She decides to try again under the pen name Frankelda. Prince Herneval finds her, reminding her that they met as children when he’d cross into the real world. He begs for her help in writing nightmares that will terrify modern humans who are so interested in science and logic. He tells her that he’s her biggest fan. Let’s face it. Most writers would go with him if he said that.

When arriving in Herneval’s world (after a break for a song), Procutes shows up. He starts by flattering Frankelda, then reads her stories. He asks what motivates her and she says, “To escape reality.” She basically says that it’s comforting for her to write when things are bad. Where Herneval only praises her, Frankelda sees Procutes harsh, yet kind sounding judging of her work as truth. She spirals about her writing and Herneval has to bring back her confidence. He does this both because he honestly loves her writing, but also because he’s falling in love with her. Despite her obvious feelings for him, she keeps feeling that he’s lying to her just to use her stories. Meanwhile, Procutes is planning a coup with other Terrors in order to kick Herneval’s parents off their thrones.

I won’t give away the whole story, but the ending is very bittersweet. Mostly, the story is about confidence in being a writer, overcoming self-doubt, understanding the difference between criticism and sabotage, and listening too the people who care about you instead of the haters. Also, so pretty! There were a couple of unfinished plots so I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a sequel.

Frankelda's Book of Spooks: Movies about Writing (Copy)

You want to see something creative and original?

Well then, "Let’s summon the writer”, as this show says.

Frankelda’s Book of Spooks is an award winning Mexican stop-motion series about Frankelda, a deceased author who needs readers for her stories or she will fade away. Her sharp-toothed talking storybook, Herneval, doesn’t see it that way, thinking that sharing stories will awake something terrible. You see what they’re doing here? Huh? Huh?

Okay, yes, the metaphor for being a writer is pretty obvious. Each episode has our ghost-host tell a story that usually a lesson for children mixed with some nasty critter or supernatural terror. I’m not gonna lie. Some of these tales were impressively scary for a kids’ show. Spoiler warning: Things never turn out well for the children in her stories which Herneval points out doesn’t seem fair. The book is like her conscience, attempting to protect you, the audience, from whatever Frankeleda’s latest story is . . . and from whatever is keeping them trapped in a scary old house.

SPOILER ALERT: As the reader, you hear a final story about a girl named Francesca Imelda who is expected to do all of the domestic duties for her father and older brothers after her mother dies and wicked Aubela moves in with them. Her escape is story writing, something she does at the most inconvenient times just like any other young writer. Her biggest fan is a owl-child (Herneval prince of the spooks - yep, the book used to be a really neat owl-prince) that lives in her house, but she thinks is a dream. By the time she’s grown, Francesca feel confident enough take the most perfected of her horror stories to a publisher, who instantly tells her that it’s unladylike. She leaves the office crying, declaring that she will quit, until she attempts to cross out her own name and ends up creating the name Frankelda. The prince of the spooks, also now grown, shows up at that moment to plead with her to help him create new nightmares so his people will not fade away. He essentially kills her in hopes that she will replace his current nightmare writer. Something went wrong and the prince was turned into a book. The original nightmare writer trapped him and Frankelda in his consciences and that’s where they have been ever since.

As an author , Frankelda is obsessive, tragic, and does not take criticism well. She doesn’t care if she puts her audience in danger for her art and her own freedom. And she will never stop writing.

Insert maniacal laughter here.

Which Brings Me to You: Movies about Writing

This is your typical romantic comedy/drama with a little twist to the meet-cute. Writer Jane (Lucy Hale) and photographer Will (Nat Wolffe) decide to hook up at a wedding. Then, at the last minute, Will changes his mind and starts spilling all of his past relationships to Jane and she does the same. This reveals each other’s personalities, quirks, and red flags within a twenty-four hour span.

Still, this is a blog about writing, so I’m going to skip to that part. Spoilers ahead:

It is mentioned throughout that Jane is a freelance journalist working on a piece about murder the in the Hampton’s while also attending the wedding (getting some work done while trying to bang randos in the coat closet, apparently). She expresses within past relationships how freelance work makes her feel independent and keeps her life exciting. However, there is one past relationship which was based very much around her writing career. When Jane was earning her MA, she tracks down one of her favorite authors who happens to be a professor at her college (not her professor, I’d like to point out, so no drama there). Wallace (the professor played by John Gallagher Jr.) expresses how he can’t stand people, leaving his house, and new life experiences. Since he’d stopped drinking, the most he could handle were teaching his classes and doing book signings, then wanting to scurry back to his den. He confesses that he took the teaching job to have more time to write, but instead watching reality TV. Feeling a little called out here.

Still, he embraces a relationship with Jane, asking her to move in after a week. Jane is a little confused by his hermit behavior, feeling that experience is a part of what makes a good writing. She continues to have a social life while he falls back into addictive behavior. She chooses to leave him, realizing that he’s not really willing to work on himself. Wallace dies shortly after, cause of death being implied as something related to his drinking or mental health.

Even though this plot line brings down the mood of the whole film, I appreciate that Jane didn’t see Wallace’s behaviors as some stereotype sign of genius. Hemingway, Joyce, Parker, Fitzgerald, Salinger, I could go on and on. They are viewed as tortured souls who drank because of their brilliance. In reality, they drank because they lived in a time when no one knew how to help them stop.

Don’t worry. The rest of the movie isn’t as heavy as that.

Quest for Love: Movies about Writing

Despite this being a Hallmark ripoff movie, I actually have lots of commentary. Settle in.

Ethan (Jake Stormoen - Adam in Seeking Persephone) is a writer of adventure books. Mackenzie (Eva Hamilton) is works at a chocolate company and is Ethan’s best friend who pines for him. Mackenzie beta read Ethan’s books for him before he send them to his editor. In exchange, he bakes her what appears to be white bread. Maybe it’s a cake, but it REALLY looks like plain white bread. I suppose that’s a metaphor for this film.

Mackenzie’s biggest criticism is that two leads of Ethan’s stories, Shane and Sabrina, have romantic chemistry and should do more than fist bump. Also, that his villains lack clear motivation to which I say - same, girl, same. Ethan refuses to have Shane and Sabrina be anything more than friends, partially because the characters are based on the two of them. Mackenzie’s token Black work friend Crystal, played by Jazmine Shaw (really, made for streaming movie? I know you’re trying to rip off Hallmark, but there some things you should NOT copy!) states that spending your time reading with a guy does not sound like fun. How dare you, madam! This is one of my favorite date night activities, although my boyfriend calls them “reading parties”.

Anyway, Ethan’s publishers want him to take his new series in a more romantic direction as well. He’s been “building a following”, but they want his work to reach outside of the adventure readers who already buy his books. Ethan complains that adding romance is forcing him to work in a different genre. I disagree. My dude, just because your book has a romance subplot, it does NOT mean you are a romance writer. Mackenzie tells him that no one expects him to be the next Jane Austen. How dare you, other madam! Austen did not just write romance, she wrote social commentary. Double anyway, Mackenzie invites Ethan to go with her on a business trip to Costa Rica for “romantic inspiration”.

If you’re wondering if this will talk at all about how climate change is effecting the cocoa production in South America . . . oh, you weren’t wondering that? That was just me. Either way, it is not brought up. Instead, the pair meets Lucas (Jonny Swenson) who instantly has a thing for Mackenzie and Ethan wants to observe them for his book. He tells her that first rule of writing is to “let the unexpected happen”. I’m not sure that I know that one, so it’s probably not the first rule. Maybe more like rule fourteen.

Ethan is a little bit of a bro, which got on my nerves. But he still asked and appreciated Mackenzie’s opinions. She seemed to be his model for his ideal female character and liked picking her brain. His writing time is referred to as going to his “cave” and I laughed out loud at that. My office is referred to as “my cave” or “the Cave of Wonders”, because I keep it dark, messy, and full of my many books and collectibles. I did enjoy the scenes where the characters in his book act out the scenes they are brainstorming. The actors purposely create over the top action sequences with silly dialogue and I loved it. Also, I enjoyed all of the stock footage of Costa Rica, but the lack of sweat on the actors was distracting. That is no way they are in a jungle. I mean, IMDB says it was filmed in Costa Rica but . . .

SPOILERS:

As Ethan starts to write out the new romance bits of his books, he freaks himself out when realizing how natural it is for his main characters to be together. He becomes twitterpated when Mackenzie explains that love is in the everyday and that’s what his book needs, a little sweet and boring between the action sequences. Ethan and Mackenzie fight after he starts to behave jealously towards Lucas. As she and Lucas grow closer, Ethan can 1) see the ways he pushed her into a relationship that wouldn’t be right for her and 2) finally write sappy, but not too sappy romantic moments in his book. Still, Ethan interrupts her date with Lucas to tell Mackenzie that he loves her (with a lot of apologizing to Lucas throughout). He presents her with the new ending of his book (which for some reason was the middle of the manuscript papers on his desk) where the two leads finally kiss. And for some reason this makes his editor cry? Can someone please check on the editor.

Hi Nellie! : Movies about Writing

This is a short one - like this movie.

Brad (Paul Muni) is a newspaper editor attempting to solve a disappearance and theft. Do police not actually solve crimes in the 1930s? They just leave it up to newspaper reporters?Anyway, I don’t want to talk about that. I want to talk about the movie’s title and the world of Great Depression era journalism according to the movies.

“Hi Nellie” is a reference to the paper’s heart throb column run by Nellie Nelson. However, there is no Nellie. At the beginning of the film, Glenda Farrell’s character, a former ace reporter named Gerry, is acting as Nellie. By the time Brad is starting to investigate the main plot line, he becomes Nellie. Being Nellie is a punishment for not getting the big scoop or wasting the paper’s time.The rest of the staff is pretty much encouraged to give the current “Nellie” as much crap as possible. Gerry is thrilled when she no longer has to read the woes of women seeking relationship advice. When Brad has the assignment, he tries to get himself fired using the column, only to accidentally make it a hit. And in making Nellie successful, he stumbles onto a clue to the mystery that got him demoted.

I just think this entire dynamic is hilarious. The paper seemed to only keep the heart throb column as a punishment. No one who considers themselves a legitimate reporter wants to “deal with” given out a advice. Plus, according to these movies, it’s their job to solve murders. Who has time to read about break-ups when you’re protecting your city one dramatized article at a time?

You Can’t Take It with You: Movies about Writing

This Frank Capra classic is about an eccentric family whose oldest daughter wants to marry into a banking family. Oh, and of course, the banking family is trying to buy the family home in a shady deal.

The patriarch of the household is Lionel Barrymore, an armchair philosopher who doesn’t believe in war or income taxes, and grandpa to the Neighborhood. His daughter, Mrs. Sycamore is a writer. His son-in-law likes to invent fireworks with the help of the former ice man that moved into their house nine years earlier. He has two granddaughters One is Essie, played by Anne Miller, a dancer who is married to a musician named Ed, but the pair also make and distribute candy as a means of paying the bills. The other granddaughter is Alice, played by Jean Arthur, who is in love with the bosses son Tony played by Jimmy Stewart. Also, in the house is their housekeeper, her fiancé, a former clerk who invents toys, and a pet raven. Alice loves her family, but worries about how her future in-laws will react to them. Most of the film is about class warfare, the definition of wealth, and various shenanigans.

At the beginning of the movie, the daughter is working on a play and asking everyone in the house if they have ever been in a monastery. When her father asks her how it’s going she says she’s written herself into a monastery and can’t get out. He replies, “Well you’ll figure out a way. Remember the time you got out of jail.” Each mishap she looks at as inspiration and excitement. Alice also asks that her mother not read any of her plays aloud upon the first meeting with Tony. Alice explains that her mother writes plays only because a typewriter was delivered to the house by mistake and she liked it. I feel like this is as good a reason for any to become a writer.

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A Witch's Tangled Hare: Movies about Writing

Remember this one?

Witch Hazel has a boiling pot to cook Bugs Bunny in her for her latest potion. As Bugs outsmarts her, their antics are observed by a balding man with a goatee in Tudor style clothing. He writes down everything he sees from Bugs as Romeo calling forth Witch Hazel Juliet to the several Macbeth references. At the end, Bugs finds the stranger crying that he’ll never be a writer.

Bugs points at him and declares with complete confidence, “Oh yes you will! Because you’re William Shakespeare!”

The struggling author sniffles and responds, “But I'm not William Shakespeare! I'm Sam Krubish!”

I admit, this has little to do with writing. Either way, if it’s been a while since you’ve watched this cartoon, you know what you should be doing right now.

Rich and Famous: Movies about Writingd

This is a remake of Old Acquaintances (the 1943 film starring Miriam Hopkins and Bette Davis) and the final movie directed by George Cukor. The story is about two best friends who each have different, yet enviable lives. Merry (Candace Bergen), who married young to a scientist their age, is a California socialite with a daughter. Liz (Jacqueline Bisset) is an academic and wrote a critically acclaimed book.

After Liz wins accolades for her first book and struggles to write her second, Merry reveals that she also wrote a book. A jealous Liz refuses to show the manuscript to her publisher, calling her own work as struggling through high art and Merry’s book as low brow bestseller material. Despite this, Liz does take the book to her publisher and it becomes a bestseller.

Soon, Merry is churning out book after book while her husband spirals into alcoholism. She focuses more on her career than her family, unable to find a balance. Granted, her husband is a total bitch about her fame as well. Meanwhile, Liz lives in a dinky New York walk-up with a bottle of scotch next to her typewriter and a series of emotionally distant relationships. Merry’s husband suggests that he and Liz have an affair. She refuses and tries to convince him to stay with Merry, yet he takes a job in Texas.

By the time both women are nearing middle age, Merry has a book receiving critical acclaim and Liz is on the book award board. The pair are still close friends, but tensions have built. Merry’s daughter has grown up and is . . . oh hey, Meg Ryan. The daughter wants independence from her mom and expects Liz to stick up for her. On top of that, Liz finally finished a very successful second book and his dating a twenty-two year old reporter from Rolling Stone magazine (who eventually leaves her for Meg Ryan). Merry lives in a selfish dream that her husband with return and she’ll win the writing award, almost ignoring Liz’s problems.

Spoiler Alert: In the end, despite the disappointments, fights, jealousies, and realities, the pair can’t live without each other. They are two accomplished women who deserve a break from drama, as Liz puts it. As remakes of old movies go this was . . . . well, kinda boring.

“If your writing doesn’t keep you up nights, it won’t keep anyone else up either” was advice given to Liz. She strives for Proust level writing. Merry uses gossip and her own experiences in order to create popular novels her husband calls trash. Mostly, the focus is lesson writing and more on the procrastination and parties. Liz constantly references the writers she admires. The movie does include a random cameo by Ray Bradbury!

I also feel like Cukor always really wanted to film sex scenes and he never could before. Those scenes always last longer than most of the dialogue moments.

The Affairs of Martha: Movies about Writing

It’s a who’s who of character actors in this 1942 B comedy! A small community of wealthy home freak out when it’s revealed that one of their maids will be releasing a tell-all book. Not knowing which maid or which family the book could be about, the wealthy start to mistreat the help who start to rebel. I love some humorous class warfare.

The voice of reason amongst the below-stairs group is young Martha (Marsha Hunt), a maid who declares that there is nothing in the Constitution again writing a book. She tries to keep an army of maids and cooks played by Marjorie Main, Jody Gilbert, and Marget Hamilton (YAAAASSSS Wicked Witch in the HOUSE!) from going on strike. Of course, Martha is the author of the soon to be published book. Martha works for the Sommerfields. The doctor/father (Melville Cooper) is a relaxed man more interested in his work than gossip. Mrs. Sommerfield (Spring Byington) is fairly calm and feels like the other women in the neighborhood are too jumpy about rumors. Their teenage daughter Miranda (Virginia Weidler) is an eccentric who already suspects Martha since she notices how smart and flowery her vocabulary is. Their grown son, Jeff (Richard Carlson) is an anthropologist has just returned from an over a year away studying the Inuit people. He brought back a stuck-up fiancee and fellow scientist named Sylvia (Frances Drake - not the pirate). By the way, almost every one in this is in another movie I love. About 1/3 of the cast appeared in some of my favorite pre-code and universal horror movies.

It’s revealed through a conversation with Martha’s super supportive publisher Mr. Archer (Allyn Joslyn) that Martha spent that past year going to night classes and writing to prove her intelligence to her secret husband, Jeff. However, Mr. Archer also wants her to forget Jeff and run off with him. There’s also a local mechanic and handy man named Danny who also has eyes for Martha. Meanwhile, Jeff assumed she would have had their marriage annulled while he was gone and is appalled to discover that she didn’t.

What I loved about this movie is that by becoming an educated writer, Martha finds her independence. Yes, she’s still in love with Jeff, but she’s able to handle the situation with confidence and poise. She explores options within her own life and tries to take control. That having been said SPOILER ALERT . . .

Mr. Archer reveals at a dinner party that Martha wrote the book that the whole neighborhood has been in fear of and that it’s been selected by the book-of-the-month-club (that’s a big deal in the 40s). The Sommerfields take the news in a variety of ways with the mother fainting, the father thrilled that it clears out his nosy neighbors, and the little sister thrilled that it ends his engagement with Sylvia. The book, it turns out, is not an expose. Instead, it’s a charming character study of how much Martha admires the Sommerfields. Jeff chases her down and they stay married in order to give the book a happy ending.

Ever Since Eve: Movies about Writing

I really like a Davies comedy. Marge (Marion Davies) plays the secretary of a novel writer named Freddy (Robert Montgomery) who thinks she’s a frump, when secretly she’s hot.

This story is more about sexism and abuse than it is about writing, but writing is a large part of Marge’s job. Marge has been repeatedly fired after ducking the advances of many bosses. In order to earn a steady income, she puts on an unflattering brunette wig, shapeless clothes, and thick glasses. She’s hired as a stenographer for a publishing agency full of male authors writing romance under women’s names. She’s assigned to Freddy Matthews, a best selling author who has difficulty focusing on his work.

Marge, determined to keep her job, foils Freddy’s attempts to go on dates or take long lunches. She is especially good at keeping him away from his type-A girlfriend who monopolizes his time. Freddy realizes that Marge is good at her job when she temporarily quits when his girlfriend accuses her of having a thing for Freddy (which she does). I would also like to point out that Freddy has a classy, British butler who is Black. This is so rare in an old movie that I did a double take. Apparently, his name was Frederick Clarke and born in London. He didn’t get a lot of work in Hollywood. I could go on a tangent about this, but I better not.

Freddy goes to look for Marge, however he finds her in her normal clothes and blonde hair, thinking the pair are two different people. He takes out blonde Marge and I had flashbacks of watching Jem as a child. Seriously, she should have dumped her boyfriend. He was dating her, but in love with Jem and ddin’t know they were the same people! What were they teaching us 80s children?! In the case of this film, Marge and her roommate decide to tell Freddy that blonde her is out-of-town until the book is finished. She’s determined not to be herself again until the book is finished because Freddy will get sued by a film studio who already bought the rights to the book.

You probably know how all of this will end. Marge makes a good task manager and sounding board for Freddy’s writing. But I also feel like she should have steered clear of Freddy. He’s irresponsible and impractical. My guess is that he was well-off before his books starting selling, otherwise he’s be more worried about finishing his book.

Honeymoon for Three: Movies about Writing

I started watching this 1941 film on TCM and as I got 10 minutes in I thought, “Have I seen this before?” Finally, I looked it up and realized it was a remake of Goodbye again (see previous blogs).

Ken Bixby (George Brent) is a successful author and former playboy getting ready to marry his secretary Anne Rogers (Ann Sheridan) when a young woman (Osa Massen) shows up at their hotel claiming to be the muse of his bestseller. Although Bixby doesn’t remember this Julie ,who is now married, but still pines for Bixby, his ego and curiosity gets the better of him. As he spends the day with Julie while her cousins (which includes a young Jane Wyman) beg Anne to stop any scandals from occurring. By the way, I want to punch Wyman’s husband in the movie so badly. He’s a condescending moron who needs a good smack. Anne seems to agree with me as she tears up his business card with force. Then Julie’s husband, Harvey (Charlie Ruggles), shows up to get a look at Bixby. Anne spends the day trying to distract Harvey as Bixby cancels his book engagements to be with Julie. All of this leads to miscommunications and court subpoenas.

As a famous writer, Bixby has hotel maids stealing copies of his book and fans waiting to see him in the lobby including a woman who named her baby after him. Anne helps him dodge most of these annoyances while trying to keep him down to earth. As his secretary, she is also one of his editors and when he tries to quote her from it, she has the great line, “That in total, is the love scene from page 77 of' ‘Silent Woods’. I typed it. . . You worked three days polishing that speech and it still sounded phony.” She has a larger vocabulary than him and states the typing for him is enough punishment in her life.

Torchy Blane Plays with Dynamite: Movies about Writing (also called Torchy Blane Playing with Dynamite)

Jane Wyman . . . how did you get here? Once again they tried to to recast the whole formula. Jane Wyman is news gal Torchy Blane. Allen Jenkins plays her lieutenant fiancee Steve McBride. And Gahagan is still Tom Kennedy. Why doesn’t that guy ever get recast? Also, this movie was made THE SAME YEAR as the two previous movies. Stop messing with our heads, Warner Bros. Also, the movie is listed everywhere as “Torchy Blane Playing with Dynamite”, but the posters all say “Plays with Dynamite”. Warner Bros. - the master of the stupid gaslighting.

Torchy decides to get herself arrested so she can get the scoop on a woman who’s been jailed for shoplifting. What the police who picked her up don’t know is that the woman is a girlfriend of a notorious bank robber and murderer named Denver Eddie. Torchy (called Helen at the prison) befriends the girlfriend from another inmate (who appears to be the only African American woman in the cell block) and the pair break out together. Steve follows, hoping the girlfriend will lead them to Denver Eddie (how’s that for a name, by the way). She and Steve meet in a bookstore and use make-up plot descriptions to tip each other off. Meanwhile, Gahagan is forced to fight in a wrestling match for . . . reasons. I don’t know. This movie is only an hour long and the story still got a little lost. The one spoiler I will give away is that another reporter blows Torchy’s cover! Is there no honor among journalists? Oh wait. No, there isn’t.

That’s the end of the Torchy Blane films and by the end of #9 she and Steve are still not married. All I have left to say is this - run, Jane Wyman! Run before Ronald Regan tries to marry you!

Torchy Blane in Chinatown & Torchy Runs for Mayor: Movies about Writing

“You’re no lady! You’re a reporter!”

Just to remind you: Newspaper woman, Torchy (Glenda Farrel) and her homicide detective fiancee Steve McBride (Barton MacLane) continue their adventures in these hour long films from the 1930s. Got it? Good.

Torchy Blane in Chinatown: Who’s in the mood for some colonization? Cue music that is probably problematic! Although, I did like the establishing shot of Chinatown that showed all of the old shops and Asian women in their 1930s attire. Steve is investigating the murder of a very white man over the possession of some very Chinese jade burial tablets. While another man (a senator with a huge “collection of stolen Asian artifacts) is being threatened, Steve tries to find the family who originally owned the jade tablets and Torchy tries to scoop his investigation. The pair have a little more communication about why Torchy shouldn’t print the investigation until Steve had more of a chance to work . . . until he refused to let her tag along or listen to any of her hunches. Let’s face it. They have a lot of red flags as a couple. Then again, Torchy has enough red flags for both of them. For example, as a victim lies dying of poison, Torchy declares, “What a story!” Gahagan (Tom Kennedy), Steve’s driver, gives her a dirty look. He’s a less problematic writer, who constantly reminding everyone that he writes poetry . . . I mean, less problematic when he’s not creeping on Chinese dancing girls. Despite this being #7 in the movie series and full of nasty remarks about Asians, the mystery was pretty good. I mean, I did guess the bad guys before Steve, but probably not before Torchy. Torchy’s writing is really less of an issue in this film, whereas Gaahagan is almost drowned for his verse.

Torchy Runs for Mayor: This eight movie in the series really comes down to how far Torchy will go for a story. It starts with Steve being nervous that Torchy has run a series of investigative bylines accusing the current mayor of being political machine boss and having crime underworld connections (both of which are true). When the mayor threatens her paper, the story is pulled until Torchy gets proof. Gahagan helps her (after she sweet talks him about his poetry) to keep spreading the word which results in a political candidate murdered and Gahagan walking the beat. Steve writes in Torchy’s name as a candidate as a joke . . . so she runs. She puts on her best “look how innocent I am” dress and declares a platform based around protecting babies.

SPOILER: For once, Steve has to to solve the case because Torchy get kidnapped by the crime boss and mayor’s minion. She also wins the election and gives up her position of power - not to return to the newspaper world, but to marry Steve. I think it’s funny how everyone assumes she’ll settle down once she’s married. I suppose I’ll find out in the final film. Tune in next week!

Torchy Blane in Panama & Torchy Gets Her Man: Movies about Writing

Once again we turn in Glenda Farrell and Barton MacLane to show us how unethical journalism can be . . .

Wait. That’s not Glenda Farrell or Barton MacLane? What goes on here?

Torchy Blane in Panama: Actors Lola Lane and Paul Kelly take on the roles of Torchy and Steve respectively for this one movie. I guess they just weren’t feeling like themselves lately (ba-dum-dum-tsk). I confess, that I find this Steve McBride hotter. I have no idea why the switched out the cast for this one film. But Lola Lane is not as cool as Glenda Farrell (sorry). Gahagan, Steve’s driver, is still played by Tom Kennedy. Torchy is annoyed that Steve won’t let her have scoops anymore after another paper gets a bank robbery story before her. Still, she gives him her theories on the case which he uses to chase the criminal to Panama . . . without her. Torchy literally drops in on the ship by jumping out of a plane. After that she flirts with an entire passenger vessel of the order of Leopards and let’s Steve get jealous. Anything for a story, I guess. I won’t give away the mystery, but I will point out a few things. 1) They stop off in Cuba. Movies from before the Cold War constantly have me believing that middle class people just popped down to Havana for a day to dance and drink. 2) Torchy wears pants and Steve is having none of it. She, of course, continues to wear them and they actually become a plot point. 3) This movie sort of forgets her goal to write a story until the last five minutes.

Torchy Gets her Man: Farrell and MacLane return in this mystery about secret service agents and counterfeit money. Despite what’s stated in the previous film, the pair are still not married and Steve’s boss is still telling him to keep Torchy away from his cases. When Steve stands Torchy up for dinner, she declares that if she can’t have steak then she will get a scoop. Through racetracks, spy rings, and bomb threats, Torchy and Gahagan work a case that Steve doesn’t even realize it going on. They borrow a German Shepherd to help them track the bad guys, however he only speaks German. I’m kind of surprised they had Torchy attempting to speak German in 1938. This movie also has the baddies underestimate Steve and even wonder why a smart woman like Torchy is with him. When Steve figures out the plot, Torchy smugly jokes to the villain, “Isn’t he the dumbest thing”. Once again, this does not have Torchy writing and printing as much as in the other movies. There are a lot of conversation with her editor who she has wrapped around her little finger though.

Adventurous Blonde & Blondes at Work: Movies about Writing

“Can't you lovebirds find something to bill and coo about besides murders and bank robberies?"

Newspaper woman, Torchy (Glenda Farrel) and her homicide detective fiancee Steve McBride (Barton MacLane) continue their adventures in these hour long films from the 1930s. Torchy has “ink in her veins” which is the part of these films I”m going to write about instead of the individual mysteries.

Both of these, which came out one after the other, deals in the ethics of a journalist dating a member of the police force. These old films make it look like reporters did all of the police work. Steve’s boss points out that reporters printing evidence as it’s found can hinder an investigation. I can’t argue with him on that one. Plus, Torchy always gets the scoop and other papers call fowl play.

In fact, the other journalists are so annoyed that in Adventurous Blondes, they try to set up a fake story to humiliate Torchy, however, it turns into a real murder case that she tries to help Steve solve. All of this interrupts their wedding.

In Blondes at Work, Steve’s captain asks why he can’t just marry Torchy and keep her at home. Steve instantly knows that he could never keep her from writing and investigating, however, he stills makes a comment to her about quitting. She just laughs it off. Again, I’m not going to give away the ending. Still, I can’t help but point out how this one ends. Torchy gets arrested for being a nuisance in an active police investigation. While she’s in the “slammer”, Steve gives the final outcome to the mystery to her paper so they can run the headline with her name on it.

Smart Blonde & Fly-Away, Baby: Movies about Writing

These are the first two pair of mystery/adventure films about Torchy Blane (Glenda Farrell), a fast talking lady reporter who is always tagging after her police detective boyfriend, Steve McBride (Barton MacLane) in search of a story. There is a third side character in every film, a cop named Gahagan (Tom Kennedy) who sometimes gets a B plot.

Generally, the stories start with McBride (who Torchy calls Skipper) being annoyed that she’s there. They face various shenanigans, then pause to eat because McBride understands you should never let a woman get hangry. Even though McBride whines that he wants Torchy to be “more of a woman” and to “go write a story about cooking”, each film ends with him relying on her to help him solve the case. This is always followed by the start of another adventure holding up their plans to get married once again. It’s a formula that works so well that it inspired Lois Lane in the Superman comics.

In Smart Blonde, the first film in the series, Torchy doesn’t do a lot writing, mostly a lot of calling to her paper. A businessman is murdered after buying a nightclub which the original owner was reluctant to sell. Since she and McBride have different theories about “who done it”, they follow different investigative routes. That doesn’t stop McBride from double checking Torchy’s suspicions and constantly checking in her with her. Despite all of the banter, they save the day and save alife.

The second film, Fly-Away, Baby (made in the same year, 1937), show more of Torchy’s career as a newswoman. Hey, a Zeppelin! Torchy joins a race around the world, comparing herself to Nellie Bly, saying she wants her newspaper to win. After a murder involving a diamond heist, McBride is convinced the killer was a former jailbird. Meanwhile, Torchy is convinced that murderer is a spoiled nepo baby reporter from a competing paper. She joins in order to get the scoop and prove he’s a killer. In this film, she does more to keep track of clues and make notes that she can use for her articles later.

I won’t give away the endings. Each film is only an hour long. I’ll let you watch them for yourself.

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