Luck of the Irish: Movies about Writing

I’m keeping this short because I soda bread to eat!

Stew! Whiskey! Leprechauns! Tyrone Power! What more could you want? How about Tyrone Power being a a freelance newspaper writer who is being asked to sell his soul to an aspiring politician?

Stephen “Fitz” Fitzgerald and his friend Bill (Bill is really more of an exposition character and does not deserve his last name) visit Ireland where they meet Nora, an innkeeper who has an instant connection with Fitz. However, he still goes back to New York where his girlfriend’s sleazy publisher father wants him to be his hired hype man for his campaign. But wait, Horace, an unusually tall leprechaun, has followed Fitz home from Ireland and is now working as his servant. Nora shows up again, milk goes missing, and Fitz tries hide from modern art by hanging it in his bathroom.

Back to his writing. Bill expresses how Fitz is an excellent writer and is so disappointed in him going to work as a political pawn because he’s tired of being a starving artist. Meanwhile, Fitz’s girlfriend, Frances, says that he’s been wasted as a freelance columnist and with her father’s power behind him he’ll make more of a difference. By the way, she’s not a terrible character. She’s independent and smart. Take note, Hallmark movies! Still, what it comes down to is Fitz not feeling comfortable when asked to lie about his own opinions and go against his writing morals for money. Because . . . you know, it’s a movie.

Anatomy of a Fall: Movies about Writing

This movie is fairly new so understand that I’m not going to be going to many details of the actual court case or end of the films. Still, spoiler warning. Also, unlike the movie, I’m going to keep this short.

Sandra, a known novelist who takes inspiration from real life, is on trial for the death of her husband Samuel, a university professor who was found dead outside of their isolated French home. I don’t understand the legal system in France, so let’s just focus on the parts about writing.

One of the driving forces in the trial is Sandra’s relationship with her husband being rocky because she was an established author and he was a struggling writer. The day Samuel dies, he’s playing loud music while a university student is trying to interview Sandra about how their son’s accident is a thinly veiled plot point in one of her books. The same accident occurred on a day Samuel decided to stay home writing and sent a babysitter to pick up the son from school. Sandra suggests that the guilt over their son’s vision loss caused Samuel to stop writing for a long time. The court suggests that it was her blaming Samuel causing that guilt. I say - why isn’t anyone mad at the babysitter?

Anyway, before his death, Samuel and Sandra had a loud fight with destruction of property about their roles as writers. Samuel accuses Sandra of forcing him to always be on her creative schedule, leaving him no time for his own writing. Sandra accuses back that he uses her as an excuse not to write. Both sides feel valid to me, yet the whole scene made me very uncomfortable - and that’s something I’m filing away for later counseling.

There is also the insinuation that he is bitter that she used an idea from one of his unfinished novels for one of her published works and now he wanted to go back to it, but it was too late. She points out that he gave her permission to use the idea and this part of the argument made me side a little more with her. Don’t give away ideas, dude. That was on you.

The big thing I wanted to point out was that (and this is a big spoiler to the movie - you have been warned) Samuel had been recording family conversations and transcribing them for the book he was working on. Sandra knew this was a process of his, but when she finds out that he taped their argument about writing in general, she starts to wonder if he planned the conversation for his recording and creative process. I think that would piss me off worse than the idea-take-back-sies. Don’t manipulate your spouse for source material. You’re not F. Scott Fitzgerald. Get over yourself.

American Dad (The Professor and the coach): Movies about Writing

American Dad is about a Republican CIA agent who lives in Langley with his perky housewife Francine, wanna-be hippy daughter Hayley, dork son Steve, stoner son-in-law Jeff, German skier trapped in a fish Klaus, and alien Roger. Roger’s favorite thing is creating personas to hide himself in plain sight.

Roger’s new persona is Professor Dickens LongBottom, a creative writing instructor at Hayley’s college. He greatly inspires her (“Me writers?”) and she decides to help him finish is novel. First, they try going to a coffee shop, but Roger finds faults with everything they do.

He confesses to being scared of his novel not being “universally beloved”, a both unrealistic and very truthful fear/goal. In order to avoid his block, Roger double dips with a second campus persona, the new football coach. Hayley keeps trying to push Roger to write because Longbottom is her favorite of his personas and she believes in him (the professor not Roger himself). Roger’s avoidance is so strong that he turns the coffee shop he he writes at into a sports bar.

Hayley insists that Roger needs to stop sabotaging himself to avoid failure. She tells him that all he needs is pen, paper, and adderall. However, the book is poorly reviewed and Roger instead writes a playbook/cookbook as the coach. Then, the coach reads the professor’s book and is touched by it. Therefore Roger decides art is worth it as long as it touches one person… even though the person touched in this case was himself. Okay, American Dad has gotten weirder over the years, but I’m sure there’s a lesson in there someplace.

In the words of Prof. Longbottom, “Writing is hard.”

Staged: Movies about Writing

I’m going to keep this one short even though I’m talking about the first season of a British series.

Staged is the fictionalized tale of David Tennent and Michael Sheen attempting to rehearse a play through some sort of Zoom app in the midst of the pandemic (I should point out that this actually came out during the pandemic).

A big part of the show is about the world going stir crazy. When Georgia, David’s wife, sells her novel, David decides to write a script. He writes it rather quickly and emails it to Georgia. He then gets no response from her even though they are trapped in the same house. Georgia then emails it to Michael. And there are several minutes of anxiety that are overshadowed by Judi Dench. And honestly, I don’t remember what happened with David’s writing attempts after that. Judi Dench was on the television swearing a lot.

Okay, actually, they all read David’s script together and it’s revealed that everyone’s favorite parts were the bits Georgia rewrote.


Castle (Reality Star Struck): Movies about Writing

This isn’t necessarily my favorite episode of the television series about a thriller writer and his job as consultant to a New York homicide detective. I just picked this one because it takes place around Valentine’s Day. As this episode is from season 5, majors spoilers for this show from fifteen years ago.

Castle and Beckett are about to have their first Valentine’s Day as a couple while investigating the stabbing of a member of a “Real Housewives” style reality show. There are jokes about what the couple will be getting each other, how their friends on the force are spending the holiday (Ryan is under his wife’s control in the attempt to convince), and how the murder weapon is high end. Actually, jokes about the fancy knife could’ve been better. “The good news is, expensive cutlery like that won’t dull while cutting bone. Too soon?”

One of the better things about this episode is it is one of many that include a guest appearance by one of Fillion’s “Firefly” co-stars, Gina Torres. It’s fun to see kick-ass Zoe as a uppity rich bitch. Castle is also appalled by the unscripted format of reality TV . . . until he gets caught up in the drama and watching the show all night long. Beckett only watches one episode because she’s classy.

This is also a side plot of Castle accidentally placing his gift to Beckett in their Captain’s coat with a romantic note (he’s a writer, of course he wrote a note). As she is not aware that they are a couple, it become a ridiculous bit of shenanigans that make me quite uncomfortable. Also, Beckett’s gift to Castle is really sweet gesture -a drawer in her apartment to keep his stuff in showing that their relationship has reached the next level. But she also gives him the smallest drawer! Did no one else notice that?

At this point in the series, Castle’s ACTUAL job as a professional author has taken backseat to the mysteries. There is at least a joke about Castle’s thinking the murder is a Valentine’s Day gift in the form of a mystery that makes no sense. The point of his role as a consultant is that his skills in people study and creation of unusual murder scenes makes him a good profiler. Hey, it’s a TV show! No one asked for reality!

All is True: Movies about Writing

At some point, I’m planning on a bunch of Shakespeare blogs, but this was on TV and wanted to watch it before it was no longer available. Streaming services are not the most reliable these days (by these days I mean summer of 2023 and time of the second major writer’s strike in my lifetime).

All is True is really Kenneth Brannagh’s and writer Ben Eltons’s vision of what it was like for William Shakespeare at the end of his career and life. I should point out that Elton was one of the writers who helped Andrew Lloyd Webber create Love Never Dies, so I’m sure he needs to do some sort of creative groveling for that crime against storytelling. Also, understand that this is NOT a debate about whether Shakespeare is the actual author of the plays, so none of that in the comments. Save that for a different film.

This is an almost an entirely fictional, trying to dramatize mysterious moments at the end of the playwright’s life.

The film starts with the Globe Theatre burning down and Shakespeare returning to the family he’s barely seen in 20 years. He has hallucinations of his son Hamnet who died at age eleven, an awkward relationship with his wife Anne (Dench), and accidentally worries his remaining children Susanna and Judith about their own futures. The bard holds on tightly to a belief that, had Hamnet lived, the boy would have been a poet like him. Meanwhile, he dismisses Susanna and Judith since they are women who never had a formal education (most historians agree that Susanna could read and write). Judith outwardly shows her disdain for her father and he asks why when he never gave her a cruel word. Anne responds, “You spent so long putting words into other people’s mouth, you think it matters what is said?”

Will uses his artistic past in an attempt to smooth certain things over in his town and with his family. For example, when a man accused Susanna of an affair and there is a suit of slander, Shakespeare informs the accuser that a well-built “Moor” who performed in his plays loved Susanna so that he would rush from London to kill any man who dishonored her. Anne points out that she met this actor and knew him to be a sweet man and Shakespeare insists she not tell the accuser that. *By the way, there really was a slander case, but the case never went through and was thought to be a result of a feud between the accuser and Susanna’s husband.

One of the big plot points is how Anne does not want to know more about Will’s life in London as everything he was rumored to have done or said effected her. The Earl of Southampton (Ian McKellen), who was Shakespeare’s patron for a time, arrives and it upsets Anne as rumors that he was her husband’s lover created problems in her life years earlier. And yet, these characters and moments are important because they reflect on how London saw fame for Shakespeare as a writer while his village only gossiped.

On the other side of the coin, you see how children are constantly told that their father the writer is genius and a celebrated poet can grow to feel less. There is a theme about the expectations of an absentee father and fame and how the two did not have to be mutually exclusive. Gender roles, societal expectations, and general personalities all play a role.

I think it was funny how William Shakespeare has a prepared speech for when people approach him with questions. “The best way to get started as a writer is to start writing. I don’t have a favorite play. I admire all my fellow dramatists equally. And, yes, I do think women should be able to perform the female roles as is the practice on the continent now.” Shakespeare does not give an answer as to why he no longer writes.

“If you want to be a writer, and speak to others and for others, speak first for yourself. Search within. Consider the contents of your own soul. Your humanity. And if you're honest with yourself, then whatever you write, all is true.”

The Good Place (A Chip Driver Mystery): Movies about Writing

I don’t want to give away the entire show of The Good Place (especially since this episode takes place in the final season), but I’m going to have to give away quite a bit to explain why I blogged this episode. Still, this to me is one of the best tv shows ever made and I encourage you to watch it.

Fair warning: spoilers ahead.

The Good Place is philosophical comedy about the afterlife and what it means to be a good person. Ted Danson plays Michael, an architect in charge of four humans named Tahani (Jameela Jamil), Jason (Manny Jacinto), Chidi (William Jackson Harper), and Eleanor (Kristen Bell). Helping them is Janet (D’Arcy Carden), an all knowing entity whose entire existence is based on being a go-fer in the afterlife.

The episode opens with a book. Michael is telling a story to a Bad Janet (also D’Arcy Carden) trying to prove that humans can improve themselves. A new group of humans are being used as unknowing guinea pigs in a human moral experiment and seems to be showing positive outcomes. Then Brent (Benjamin Koldyke), the worst of the three, announces that he has written a book and he wants Chidi, John (Brandon Scott Jones), and Simone (Kirby) to read it in two days before he does a signing. An afterlife signing. Apparently, that’s a thing.

Brent describe the book entitled “Six Feet Under Par: A Chip Driver Mystery” as “half-spy novel, half -murder mystery. It’s also half-submarine adventure, half-erotic memoir, and half- political thriller. It’s also half- golf tutorial and half- commentary on society”. Immediately, Simone, who has very little patience for Brent’s sexism, racism, classism, and a whole lot of other negative isms, is gleeful about making fun of this novel. Tahani suggests that they all be kind because Brent has been showing improvement and they should be the bigger people (since that’s exactly what she’s trying to make them into). Then she starts to read the book with Eleanor and Michael.

The love interest Scarlett Pakistan in the book is a cultural stereotype who looks like Tahani and is described as “Her brown eyes were as brown as the brownest crayon. She had legs like Jessica Rabbit from that movie”. Is it bad that I sometimes enjoy bad writing because it makes me feel relatively better about my own writing? Stop judging me! I never said I belonged in the Good Place!

Tahani is not the only human objectified and insulted by being a thinly veiled character in Brent’s book, making it difficult to get the others to be kind about the painfully terrible prose. Eleanor tries to get them to create subtle criticisms. This is a good lesson for anyone not wanting to hurt another person’s writer feelings. For example, pointing out that “just writing a book is an amazing accomplishment” and then following with a sandwich of what you like and what needs improvement. That’s what editing is for. It’s a pain in the butt, but thanks the gods for the editing process and the people willing to edit.

However, if someone writes a book that insults you and your beliefs and the author can’t respect that why you didn’t like it - rip them a new one. Yes, a book is a form of art, but if your art is hurtful to the people you claim to like, what is the point? And how can you be upset if they don’t like that you hurt them? That’s not art, that’s more about ego. Despite all of this, Eleanor and the others still want to help Brent become a better person.

And all of this ends back with Michael finishing his story about how people can be good.

The Murderer Lives at Number 21: Movies about Writing

Here’s a short one with spoilers galore - you have been warned.

The Murderer Lives at Number 21 is the 1942 directorial debut of Henri-Georges Clouzot and it’s. . . unusual. Not quite a comedy. Not quite a thriller. Not quite a horror story. One hundred percent French.

Wens, a detective on the hunt for a serial killer who leaves calling cards at every crime scene, goes undercover at a boarding house. His girlfriend, a struggling singer, also goes to live in the boarding house in an attempt to become famous by catching the killer (she’s hoping fame will equal more stage jobs). The boarding house is inhabited by a magician, a disgraced doctor, a bird calling servant, a creepy toy maker, a blind former boxer, his amorous nurse, and a struggling author.

The author is a “spinster” called Mademoiselle Cuq. She states that to be a writer, you don’t need inspiration you need discipline. She sits everyday in the parlor of the boarding house with a typewriter to finish her latest work despite constant rejections from publishers. I like her determination. When the murders continue, the lady thinks of turning the contemporary horrors into gothic tales of terror, changing the streets of Paris into a dusty castle. The detective’s girlfriend suggests that the author instead keeps the setting the same, having it take place in the boarding house. In truth the singer is trying to reveal that she’s aware that the killer is among them . . . however, it just ends up getting the author killed. Whoops.

L.A. Confidential: Movies about Writing

This one is going to be short because in the words of this film, “Something has to be done, but nothing too original, because hey, this is Hollywood.”

If you’ve never seen it, L.A. Confidential is a superb film based on the James Ellroy novel about three members of the LAPD in the 1950s all investigating the same conspiracies of corruption and murder. Russell Crowe, Guy Pearce, and (blech) Kevin Spacey all play their roles well. The clues and characters are a gritty portrait of the world full of twists and turns.

That’s not what I’m going to write about though! One of the most sleazy characters of the tale is Sid Hudgens (played by Danny DeVito - despite the book portraying the same character as tall and thin). Sid is the writer and editor of a tabloid magazine called Hush Hush which gets scoops on all of the Hollywood dirt. As this journalistic rag is Sid’s livelihood, he is shown setting up his own supposedly true stories. Based on a rumor, Sid puts the right people in the wrong place by buying everyone off and making sure his men are there with flashbulbs. More than being a plain gross example of a human and a writer, Sid’s way with words is what ties together the sleaze, the deceptions, and the murders of the film.

Glynis: A Movies about Writing

I wrote this blog back in July of 2022, hoping someone could find this an episode of this show for me to watch.

I just found out that there was a Murder, She Wrote BEFORE Murder, She Wrote. In the 1960s Glynis Johns (you know, the mom from Mary Poppins) starred in a sitcom about a mystery writer married to a defense attorney and they solved crimes together! But all I can find of this show is a thirty second clip! Does anyone know if anything else of it exists? Is there any place to watch a full episode? If you do know, please leave comment below. Thanks for fueling my obsession.

Despite looking on my own, all I’ve still ever found besides the thirty second clip is a newspaper article reviewing the show from back in the day and this review from IMDB.com from someone with the handle rudy-30:

The worst case of laugh track abuse ever!

9 April 2008

Warning: Spoilers

Jess Oppenheimer must have been an optimist. His most successful production, "I Love Lucy", centered around a female wanting to make it big in her husband's career. Unfortunately, lightning doesn't always strike twice. Glynis Johns plays Glynis, a novice mystery writer married to a criminal defense attorney. Glynis finds herself involved in murders by accident, and of course, comes out in the end a winner. Her husband (a bland Keith Andes) is usually clueless, and instead of a female friend for Glynis, which would be too much of an obvious rip-off of "I Love Lucy"s premise, she has a retired policeman friend to rely on. The trouble with this show is the laugh track. Murder can be funny, when it's played straight, but the actors on the show seem confused; they don't know when to play for laughs or dramatic effect. So, you have a mish-mosh of comedy and drama, and that annoying laugh track doesn't help one bit. What is so funny about a schizophrenic murderess? Did anyone really laugh at Anthony Perkins in "Psycho"? I notice that Oppenheimer later got the mixture right when producing "Get Smart". It's a shame he didn't have the creative forces with him during "Glynis". The cast gave it their best efforts, though.

Event though nothing I have found makes it sound like I would actually enjoy this show, now that Glynis Johns (a favorite actress of mine from not only Mary Poppins, but The Court Jester with Danny Kaye) has passed away at the fantastic age of 100, I’m still curious. So again, if anyone knows where episodes are available to watch. let me know. Thanks.

Winter Love Story: Movies about Writing

Since I actually, kind of enjoyed Mistletoe Inn, I decided to try one more Hallmark movie about a writer. I regret my decision. Although, full disclosure I missed bits of the beginning.

Cassie (Jen Lilley) is the daughter of a celebrated novelist and Princeton professor. She has just published her own first book following her divorce, a romance memoir full of humor and real-life inspired feelings. Her publisher asks bestselling fantasy author Elliot (Kevin McGarry) to help Cassie with being comfortable doing book readings and signings. He agrees and the pair go on tour together along with Elliot’s adorable dog, Bungee. Blah blah blah, they fall in love, they have a misunderstanding, they end up together. Oops, did I spoil it?

First of all, in the scenes where Elliot’s books are being read out loud, they still sound like the style of a romance novel, just with a dragon written in. Then again, his audience did seem to be a lot of twenty-something women who wanted to jump his bones. At least the film was realistic in its decision to show that even published authors who aren’t bestsellers need to supplement their income by showing Cassie as a barista. However, she works in a small coffee shop owned by her roommate. Mom’s a famous author who gave her advice. She lives with her boss. Cassie’s life is a lot of near-nepotism. At least Cassie admits this and chooses not to use her mom’s last name on her own book.

The concept of the book tour itself is a tad cringe. Two almost strangers taking a road trip together while their “point people” make sure they have places to stay in each city felt a little too fancy for a publishing company to pay for. If they hadn’t constantly pointed out that Elliot was making the company LOTS of money, I would have been making psh sounds through the whole movie. Also, they appear on a morning show together. I would understand interviewing Elliot about his popular series, but what kind of strings did they have to pull to let Cassie talk about her book too? (She chokes by the way and Elliot tries to teach her about “public speaking”).

What I did like was that Elliot immediately read her book as a way to get to know her and have a better working relationship. Meanwhile, Cassie is just a snob about his work calling him the “dragon-writer” and sneering as she refers to his work as “nerd novels”. Then she keep apologizing right afterwards like a passive-aggressive “no offense” comment. She learns her lesson, but seriously rude!!!! Cassie is not a particularly likable character, complaining when her room at the bed and breakfast is tiny and acting all superior. Elliot is the best promoter, giving her opportunities that a publishing company would never give unless her books were selling like his. He even confesses to her that he has writer’s block and she says nothing helpful! You’re both writers! Be a writer and try to help the man!

By the last twenty minutes Cassie almost won me over. She finally started to give back professionally to Elliot and was excited to be trying new reading and writing topics. She takes initiative in her own career while appreciating the careers of other authors. AND YET SHE COULD NOT GET OVER THAT ELLIOT HAD A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS EX-WIFE. Holy crap! He’s a better person than you. Deal with it.

Also, the dog needed more scenes.

Snowed Under: Movies about Writing

“Guess where I am!”

“Oh Arthur! Where are you?”

“I don’t know. It’s all covered in snow”

1936 was one of those years where Hollywood was just trying to release as many movies as they could like throwing spaghetti on a wall to see if it sticks. Snowed Under does not stick, but it has a few good bits, one-liners, and shows off the talents of many forgotten character actors. Mostly, it’s just tired shenanigans (yes, even in 1936 there were overused film stereotypes).

Alan Tanner (George Brent) has been struggling to rewrite the third act of his play which opens soon. His producer and friend, Arthur Layton (Porter Hall) asks Alan’s ex-wife Alice (Genevieve Tobin) to help him. It is suggested that at one time, the three of them were a great playwright- editor - producer trio and she agrees out of her friendship to Arthur. However, also showing up at Alan’s Connecticut cabin are his second ex-wife Daisy (played by the original tough girl Glenda Farrell), Daisy’s lawyer McBride (John Eldredge), a deputy/former milkman named Orlando (Frank McHugh), and Alan’s young love struck neighbor Pat (Patricia Ellis).

Daisy is demanding Alan be arrested for missing her alimony payments, Pat is declaring her undying love, and Alice just wants everyone to shut up so Alan and finish his work. Then, as the title suggests, the group is snowed in for the night and the shenanigans ensue.

What I did enjoy was the writing talk. Alice is clearly a professional and she writes half of the third act herself (without expecting credit because it’s the 1930s). Pat keeps insisting that Alan doesn’t need Alice and she could keep him writing, yet never does anything to prove this. And Daisy just wants the play finished so she can get paid. Still, there’s a great scene where Alice turns to Daisy (her rival and the reason for her divorce) and asks, “Would you do me a favor? Would you read what I’ve done to that third act and tell me what you think of it?” And Daisy grins happily at the woman who Alan was always comparing her to and responds, “I’d love to read it.”

As for Alan, he criticizes Alice’s work to the point that she tries to burn it. He says he does this to see if she really cared about what he had to say, but in truth I find it a simply awful moment in the film. It showed to me that he didn’t respect her talent. However, the entire thing ends in horseplay, Pat coming in to angrily confront Alan, and Alice just giddy that for once she gets to be the other woman. Lady, your ex-husband just tried to make it seem like your work as his editor and co-writer, is no good. Stay angry!

I could give insight into Alan’s writing. Honestly, with all the other chaos, he really does not do a lot of that.

Spoiler alert: Alan does give Alice credit in the end. Despite all of the tired tropes in this, I did not see that coming.

A Christmas Memory: Movies about Writing

Netflix. You need to learn to think for yourself. But no. You keep canceling some of your best shows in favor of spending money on Hallmark holiday ripoffs. Luckily, there’s still some class on streaming.

I found the 1997 version of A Christmas Memory by Truman Capote on Kanopy. Eric Lloyd (from the Santa Clause) plays young Capote in the form of Buddy who is excited for “fruitcake season” with his best friend/ spinster cousin Sook (Patty Duke). They send the cakes to everyone including F.D.R. For several years, Buddy has lived with the Southern cousins Sook, Callie, Seabone, and Jennie (Piper Laurie) (as well as a dog named Queenie and visits from a Cherokee housekeeper named Anna and a neighbor girl named Rachel - not Harper Lee, or is it, I’m not sure). Other than Sook, the cousins make snide comments make about his mother back in New York and his absentee father. Jennie worries that Buddy is not going up to be “a man” since he spends all of his time with Sook.

Despite the protests from the other three cousins, Jennie is determined to send Buddy away to military school. Still, Buddy and Sook go through their Christmas adventures of tree chopping, gift delivering, kite flying, and visiting bootleggers. In the end, Buddy is still sent away in hopes that the military school will give him a better education. It gives Sook opportunities to stand up to Jennie and both she and Buddy grow up a little. It’s kinda dark for a Christmas story.

I did also watch the 1966 version narrated by Capote himself which includes more of his fantastic descriptions, but depicts the Native bootlegger talks in broken English like a reject from a 1950s western. Buddy doesn’t go to military school on screen in that one either, just in an epilogue.

By the way, I know Truman Capote did go to military school, but I don’t know if the cousins sent him or his mother did. Either way, there is mention of Buddy’s future as a writer. He gives a notebook and pencil to Rachel so she can write down tall tales she tells about her family. And everyone talks about how they’ll miss hearing his “little stories”. And those little stories would someday be about them.

The Noel Diary: Movies about Writing

Netflix decided to jump on the cheesy Christmas special train a few years ago, but this was the first one I found about a writer.

Jacob Turner is a successful historical thriller novelist with his face pasted on buses and people coming to signings dressed as his characters. He lives with his dog Ava in a house full of pretentious trappings like French cinema, David Sedaris books, Nina Simone albums . . . aw, crap. I’d totally be friends with this shmuck. His mom, a hoarder, passes and Jake goes home for the first time in years to clear out her house. He reconnects with his favorite neighbor, Ellie, whose house he used to stay at when his mom was having “bad days”. Ellie points out how she can recognize characters from his books, especially the two based upon his parents. His father had not been around much after Jacob’s brother passed away in a childhood tree-related accident.

Unexpectedly, a lovely young woman name Rachel shows up on her door looking for her birth mother (Noel) who was Jacob’s childhood nanny. She’s looking for a job as a UN translator which is a great job. In fact, everyone in this has a great job! Rachel’s parents make their own jewelry, Ellie is an artist, and Ellie’s boyfriend is in a symphony orchestra. Does this world just have awesome jobs for all? Who collects the garbage?

The pair go on a road trip to find Jake’s dad, Scott, while reading Noel’s Diary which Scott found in a box. It’s a Christmas movie about look for a woman named Noel. Get it? Yep. Groan. While on their journey they watch It’s a Wonderful Life on an outdoor screen in the snow. It’s a lovely scene and all I could think was, “Cold. So cold.” Jacob works on his latest book while Rachel bonds with Ava the dog. Rachel reads the first book in Jake’s series, but waits to tell him until she’s finished for the plain and simple reason of “what if I didn’t like it”. She uses the book to psycho-analyze him, yet does still compliment him on the ending.

The film gets all dramatic as Jake reunites with his dad and they find Rachel’s mom. There’s a lot of commitment issues and “Say Anything” moments minus the boombox. This was a more serious movie than I was expecting. Still cheesy. Suuuuuper cheesy. Then I found out it was based on a Richard Paul Evans book. That makes sense. But at least one of the main characters was a fluffy dog!

Shaking my fist at Krampus

Yesterday was Saint Nicholas Day, when the immortal spirit of a Turkish bishop puts toys in kids’ shoes (or if you’re an adult - a Chompie’s Gift Card. Sometimes he’s accompanied by Black Pete, but I’m not going near that tradition. Other times, Krampus tags along in order to punish the naughty.

Whelp. I must’ve pissed Krampus off recently because I woke up to my car not starting, my work drive glitching, and my “lady time” being extra weird. What the hell, Krampus! I thought we were cool, man!

A Cinderella Story: A Christmas Wish: Movies About Writing

I love a good Cinderella story . . . And this . . . How do I be diplomatic?

Let’s just dive in. The Cinderella is played by Laura Marano, an actress from one of those Disney Channel shows where the kids all have to sing and/or dance). Kat (nope, not Ella) is an aspiring songwriter who is working on a crappy Christmas pop tune. Sorry. Sorry. Anyone who knows me knows that 12 years of retail killed most “popular” Christmas songs for me. I generally just stick to the soundtrack from Muppet Christmas Carol and the classics preferably sung by Ella Fitzgerald. I should warn all the songs in this are unbelievably auto tuned Which surprised me since the main actress was on a show where all they did was make her sing. OK, deep breath, as we dive in even further.

Kat works at a Christmas Santaland as a dancing, singing elf with her best friend. She is trying to save up money to move out of her stepmother’s house, but knows realistically she can’t until she gets her inheritance at the age of 18 (which is still several months away). Also working at Santaland in secret is Dominic Wintergarden (Gregg Sulkin). Yes. That is his name. His dad (billionaire who, spoiler alert, used to be best friends with Kat’s philanthropist father) Insist that his son dresses as Santa (it is family tradition). Oh yeah. They also own Santaland.

Even though having an eighteen year old play Santa is already awkward, Kat’s best friend starts calling him “hot Santa” and “sexy Santa”. At one point he and Kat even do weird striptease, Removing hats and fake ears in order to reveal who they truly are under the costumes. And that is about the point when I sped up the speed of the movie So I didn’t have to torture myself through all 85 minutes.

Can’t hold it in anymore. I’m sure many people worked very hard on this movie, but I was in physical pain watching parts of it. It wasn’t even just the corn ball. It was scenes like scenes silly striptease with Santa (look how cute we are Even though she’s technically under age, and you’re making jokes about removing clothing - Yes, I know the actors are in their 20s; it’s the thought of it in a kid’s movie not the reality) and a random duet between Kat and “prince charming” when all of the other songs were performances/part of Kat’s songwriting process. And then at the end, she breaks the forth wall right before the “big kiss” and I suddenly felt very uncomfortable! Don’t look directly at the camera before you make out! It’s creepy!

What I did like was that she and her best friend were both creatives who supported each other (her songwriting and her friend’s aspirations to be a costume designer). Her step-mother is super wicked. She kept feeding on Kat’s insecurities and keeping her down by telling her she’s never survive as a songwriter. I kept expecting the woman to harm Kat’s disabled dog just to add to the wickedness. Also, the dog was named Bruno.

A Thanksgiving Visitor: Movies about Writing

Although this is not about writing, it is based on Truman Capote’s happy childhood memories staying with his “spinster cousin”, a woman in her 60s named Miss Sook (Geraldine Page). Young Capote is called Buddy (Michael Kearney) in these childhood tales while adult Capote in all of his lispy glory narrates.

Buddy is being horribly bullied by a classmate named Odd Henderson (I’m not kidding, that his name). Miss Sook is the only person in the household who understands that academic Buddy does not know how to fight back against a bully like the other cousins want him to (yes, everyone else in the house keeps telling him to punch this kid back - oh, the good ole’ days). As a more progressive adult, Miss Sook then invites Odd Henderson to Thanksgiving dinner.

There are other childhood traumas such as one of the cousins trying to force Buddy to kill a turkey and jealousy over attentions of a pretty young female cousin. Hey, Truman Capote could have been curious about pretty girls as a child.

SPOILER ALERT: Of course, a drama occurs when Buddy sees Odd steal Miss Sook’s cameo. Buddy tries to reveal the theft in front of everyone at dinner and Miss Sook tries to cover for Odd because she states that “two wrongs don’t make a right”. Buddy humiliating Odd didn’t help the situation. However, Odd does return the cameo when Miss Sook lies that the cameo was not missing.

Miss Sook is clearly an inspiration for a writer’s voice. The way she talks is very poetic yet simplistic. She is also a woman trapped in a family who does not understand her and dreams of leaving for a new life. But a single woman in Great Depression South is not a person able to escape those with small minds. Of course, the cameo she planned to sell for her freedom was worthless and she never has the heart to tell Buddy.

Post -Halloween Blues

I’m gonna go watch a horror movie and no one can stop me! The decorations are staying up! Forget you, Thanksgiving! Sorry Sarah Josepha Hale, but it’s a mess of a holiday with an even messier history! I’m going to watch Michael Meyers make a mess instead!

Where to put the skulls?

Every year I make sugar skulls for Dia de los Muertos, but I’m not Mexican. I’m part Italian. I just enjoy the process and the decorating. Then… I never know what to do with them. There used to be an older cemetery between my commute from work to home and I would find the oldest grave I could to leave on. I’ve since moved further into the city. Why don’t they put more cemeteries in city limits? Commuting with sugar skulls is terribly awkward. Just saying.