The Bride Goes Wilds: Movies about Writing

Time for a movie about two big topics of the writing world: marketing and collaboration with an illustrator.

I don’t think I’d ever seen this one before catching it on TCM the other day which is odd since it stars Van Johnson, June Allyson, and Hume Cronyn. I just assumed that late night AMC and TNT in the 90s played every sappy movie starring those three that existed. Also, hey children of my generation! Remember when other channels used to play old movies on late night TV with lots of Campbell’s Soup ads? No. Just me?

Van Johnson plays alcoholic, womanizing children’s author Greg who uses the pen name Uncle Bumps (yes, you read that right) who is considered a genius in his field, but his suffering publisher John McGrath (Cronyn) can’t keep on top of deadlines. McGrath has hired Martha (June Allyson) as Greg’s new illustrator, having had children pick her pictures through a contest. What makes Martha a good children’s artist is that she is an elementary school teacher who understands how children think. I like that they establish that she loves and is good at her day job, but is still is so happy to have the opportunity to be a professional artist.

In case you haven’t figured this out, Greg tries to use the collaboration to seduce Martha. When getting her drunk doesn’t do the trick and has her ready to expose Uncle Bumps as morally reprehensible, McGrath plays on her sympathies by giving Greg a pretend son, (Jackie “Butch” Jenkins) Danny, who he borrows from an orphan’s home. And, as it turns out is true in many cases of famous children’s authors, Greg does not like kids.

By the way, my modern sensibilities got very defensive when Martha expresses that she has a genetic tendency towards alcoholism which is why she is a teetotaler AND HE STILL PLIES HER WITH BRANDY! When she figures it out, she storms out and cries! Cries because she knows she shouldn’t be drunk and because “he blew in her ear”. Date rape and kicking someone off the wagon - gee, wasn’t 1948 swell? Oy.

I was also horrified by Martha’s hometown boyfriend messing with Greg’s typewriter. He pulls out the ribbon and starts hammering at the internal parts with a golf club! It was manslaughter! You leave that beautiful typewriter alone, you comedic hack!

Little Danny is presented as a terror of a child, creating a backstory for Greg’s drinking. The plan backfires when Martha decides that she wants to help mend the relationship between Danny and Greg. In case you haven’t guessed, this is all leading to boy gets girl, boy loses girl, etc.

First off, I was super impressed with the amount of marketing that the publishers did. The movie opens with the lobby/bookstore of the company full of cartoon displays and people dressed up as storybook characters! The opening line is about how “Mother Goose” is getting a raise! Seriously, that is good advertising right there! Few kids can resist costumed characters . . . unless it’s 6 foot tall man dressed as Elmo. Even infants know there’s something just not right in that scenario.

Also, the way that Martha got her job is also a part of a good promotion. They advertised the new Uncle Bumps book by asking for artwork of the title character, The Bashful Bull. The artwork was then judged by children from the local foundling home who fit the age range/reading level. Then they had toy bulls all ready made to go with the unpublished work. Genius, I say! Hood the kids before the book is even written.

Collaboration comes in two forms. First there is the production of illustrations. Martha’s art is a very Disney’s early Silly Symphonies style. They do a good job portraying this with a presentation of rough sketches which the author then describes what he wants and she elaborates. They use good criticism and a balance of ideas. It’s quite a well done scene.

Then there is the inspiration drawn from hanging out with an actual kid. Danny provides Greg with the ideas and play kids enjoy, something more engaging than a lot of alteration and mindless moral tales.

One last thought about this film, but I’ll admit it has nothing to do with writing. The little boys in the movie have suction cup arrows that stick perfectly to everything they hit. THIS IS A MOVIE MAGIC LIE!!! I had plenty of suction cup toys as a kid and they never stuck to anything except the car window and that always got me in trouble.

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