If Sleeping Beauty was Social Isolating

Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, a princess was under a terrible sleeping curse, granted at her birth by an angry fairy. The princess knew nothing of this, only that her parents, the king and queen, were extremely over protective of her. She could not sneeze from a bit of dust without the court physician being called for.

Then, a bought of plague reached their kingdom due to lax trade laws and lack of general hygiene. To keep the beloved princess from catching the disease, she stayed in the castle and everyone agreed to stay at least six feet away from her.

On her sixteenth birthday, knowing she couldn’t have a party, all of the princess’s friend and subjects sent her gifts. She opened each present from a safe distance from even her own parents, who oohed and awwed at each new gown and shawl.

One of the largest gifts in the pile had shiny green and purple wrapping. Everyone thought it was from someone else and were debating such as she opened it. No one noticed as she pulled back the wrapping to see something new to her - a spinning wheel - the exact object which would seal her sleeping curse. By the time the court looked upon it, they were too late to run the six feet across the room and smack the spindle out of the young girl’s hand.

The princess pricked her finger and fell into a hundred year sleep. A good fairy, figuring that this was an option for quarantining the plague any way, put the entire kingdom to sleep.

A century passed behind a wall of thrones before a prince stumbled upon the kingdom. The brambles parted fro him and his heart led the way directly to the sleeping princess. Never in his life had he seen anyone more beautiful. He leaned down over her perfect face and still eyes. His lips pressed into hers. Then, he felt a hand wack him on the back of the head.

He stumbled backwards, his stunned expression attempting to size up the now completely awake princess.

“What is wrong with you?” she yelled. “Don’t you know there’s a plague? I’m social distance, you dick! Why do you just kiss people? Don’t you have any manners?”

Luckily, it had turned out that in the last one hundred years, a cure for that particular strain of plague had been discovered. With the kingdom restored and the people once again relatively healthy, the princess spent time teaching the prince about boundaries. The end.